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Romeo What the heck was that big scene all about?
Juliet Who knows? I just passed out for a second
and everybody’s losing it. Luckily the dagger wasn’t sharp.
Romeo And the apothecary screwed up big-time!
What do you say we head home?
Juliet Sounds like a plan, my medieval man!

And so ends the “happy ending” edition of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, only one of a number of modifications available to customers of CustomizedClassics. In addition to being able to switch Romeo Montague and Juliet Capulet to Joe Sixpack and Jane Doe, book buyers can also choose from a number of Sherlock Holmes classics, Tarzan and The Jungle book and more, having their names and other details substituted. A version of Moby Dick starring a corpulent enemy or mother in law is even possible. Literary subversives could role-reverse Sherlock Holmes and Moriarty, or even Watson and the Hound. It’s a far cry from the customized kids’ books of a decade ago, and remains to be seen where this could end up: Stephen King’s IT, starring you and your friends?